Stillness is the Move

I sat at the waist of Mukesh-Bhai as he wrapped his hands around my face, tenderly touching his fore fingers to my temple and steadily pushing on my jugular veins. The instructions were, “No breathing, instant peace”, instructions so vague that in my processing of its words I decided on a binge to hold my breath and hope for the best. In my closed eyes, all that I saw was darkness and in my open ears, all I could here was the sound of the wind around me. But all of this awareness escaped me in a matter of seconds. To survive this experience of holding your breath at the same time as somebody pushes it out of you, you have to let go of everything. Your muscles must be totally relaxed and your mind can only be focused on relaxing. Tense muscles and random thoughts mean oxygen, and if you don’t do this, you fail. When he let go of my throat, I gently inhaled which is quite surprising considering the fact that I had been grasped around the neck for over a minute. To me this meditation seemed to be only around ten maybe fifteen seconds, a probable result to the deliriousness I experienced due to the lack of oxygen entering my brain. I think that I enjoyed it. It is just weird to think that I experienced something that could be defined as internal piece. Whenever you experience anything, you always long for an even higher mountain. When I experienced the meditative version of internal piece, I felt this feeling. You hope and believe that there is something better out there, something that you can continue to strive for. When I think of spirituality, I think of something that is earthly yet too powerful to truly wrap your head around. For me, I can’t even wrap my head around the definition of spiritual.