a little courage
Control.
As I travel to a place far away where I know little of the culture, cannot speak the language, and am in a strange environment I am forced to realize that my world is no longer in my control. This scary realization daunts me at the gate door. Anxiety. Who will I be in the next two weeks when I am forced to acclimate to a world I have never been in?
As I begin to start my journey to Ahmedabad I am faced with the fact that I am clueless to this new place. Whether it be my foolish Western notions of a “far away” place like India or my own lack of knowledge, it is clear to me that I do not have any idea of where I’ll be in the coming days. This lack of knowledge scares me to some extend. When I get to India though I hope to take the leap of faith and embrace the many new things that may not be in my comfort zone. The many new beautiful things in India will be faced with an open mind and heart. When I get to Ahmedabad I am faced with fact that I will at times not be able to express what’s on my mind to the people around me nor will I know what customs or cultures to follow. My loss of control of my surroundings daunts me, but I hope to leave that attitude behind. Who will I meet? What will I do on these next days? All these questions are unanswerable. I won’t know till it happens which takes a different type of care and courage than I’m used to.
When I step out of our connection flight to Ahmedabad I hope to face these next two weeks with courage and insight. No matter how at a loss of control I am with my surroundings I am able to make my actions count. I am no longer in a place of control, but with an open mind and a little courage there is no need to be. I hope to leave behind the parts of me that don’t want to step out of box or feel a little uncomfortable sometimes, because that unease is a beautiful thing. It means that you are learning, opening your eyes, and most importantly making a change to the person you are. The person I left behind at Logan does not know India and that’s a good thing, because now I know I will grow in ways that were not possible before.
--Mekedas