Goodbyes with a Hello

As I sit on the plane to Doha, I remind myself of my desire to escape from technology a little bit, but after just finishing the new season of Orange is the New Black, I can’t stop thinking of the goodnight song one of the characters sings to all the objects in her room. She is considered crazy, but it is a way to acknowledge the presence of the things around her. I too wish to acknowledge things around me, but the things I have left behind on this journey immediately come to mind. I have decided to write my own version, but with goodbyes.         

            Goodbye cozy bed, my sense of comfort, my comfort zone.        

            Goodbye vast clothing selection, my choice of fashion, my expression of privilege.

            Goodbye mom, my safety net, my ability to be selfish, a diva.

            Goodbye my sister, my rock, my sense of a guaranteed friend.    

            Goodbye my brother, the one who challenges me, for I will be challenged in an entirely new way.

            Goodbye my puppies, my image of wonderful childhood, my ignorance towards the struggles of others.

            Goodbye Chipotle, my innate Americanness, my inability to appreciate authentic culture.

            Goodbye crossed arms, my closed off body, as I surrender to pure openness, vulnerable.

            Goodbye violence as I embrace the ideas of Mahatma Gandhi.

            Goodbye complaints of hunger and exhaustion as I fully surrender my attention to a new adventure.

            Goodbye shorts and t-shirts as I treat this trip as a chance for learning, not a tourist.     

            Goodbye selfishness as I embrace Niswarth, Non Sibi, Not for Self.

            Goodbye known.

            Hello unknown.

            I’m ready for you.

--Max